According to a recent email, I have a deadline for planning a vacation before June 30, or at least a two or three day get away to one of the offerings of Vacation Internationale before some of my “points” expire. Yes, there was a brief moment in time, and perhaps a lapse in judgment, when we purchased shares in a point-based resort vacation (time-share) company. Larry loved a bargain, and the idea of “free.” We were lured to one of those interminable 90 minutes presentations, rewarded with three days in Las Vegas (in one of the older, sleazier hotels, now demolished). They sweetened the pot with a week in Mexico, and because the company’s headquarters are in Redmond, we were given their lowest price. (Yeah, right!)
It was the summer following his retirement and Larry was in the rapid weight loss phase from his gastric bypass surgery. We had visions of a future when he would have more energy, better health, and time to travel. We began to make 30th anniversary cruise plans, to imagine exploring the Southwest and Hawaii and Canada, returning to Las Vegas, with accommodations provided.
Somehow Larry’s 40 year career in ministry had superseded the idea of time off and self care; his lifelong strategy of finding comfort in food had brought him to a twenty five year struggle with diabetes and morbid obesity and blocked arteries. The decision for surgery waited until he was ready to retire, to give himself permission and the time and effort required. He was told weight loss would relieve him of his sleep apnea and his diabetes, reduce his reliance on medication. Of course, the trade off was relearning how to eat--smaller portions, better nutrition, and taking supplemental vitamins. Five years ago Larry did lose 80 pounds post surgery. His highest weight had been 360, he lost forty pounds on a liquid diet to qualify for the surgery, and managed to maintain at 235-240.
Then his kidneys quit.
Within the year, I retired to be his caregiver, to make the most of the time we had, to live in hope that there would be a kidney transplant, knowing that a transplant was not a cure for renal failure, only the best treatment. I will always be grateful to the four people who started the process to become kidney donors. Each, for various reasons, was disqualified, but the gesture did not go unappreciated.
Even though I announced my decision to retire was based on the need to give 100 % of my attention to my husband, several people approached me, asking me about my “plans” for retirement. On the day we bought our time share, we had plans. The day Larry’s kidneys failed, all our plans changed.
Today, I looked at the options for places to go--either mountains or beaches--considered the best time to do something new and different, in a new and different way.
Plans for retirement? How about a plan to get myself out of the house in the morning, and the morning after that?
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